• Bridalplasty… Our Obsession With “Perfect”

    January 27, 2011 - Comments (36)

    So, I’m flipping through the channels tonight for a bit with my wife when I see an advertisement on E! network for a show called, Bridalplasty. The premise of this latest addition to the world of not quite reality shows is this: Women who are engaged to be married are brought together to compete for the chance to have a complete plastic surgery makeover before their big wedding day. Wow. So basically, now that these women have found their true love, someone who loves them for who they are, they are wanting to change who they are right before their wedding!?! I cannot help but wonder if their vows will read any differently than the traditional ones… “For richer or for poorer. In sickness and in health. In your old face or your new face. I do.”
    All joking aside, I see society’s constant pursuit of so-called physical perfection, and it occurs to me that trying to raise my two daughters with a positive self image, and healthy knowledge of how beautiful they really are, will be nothing short of an uphill climb. The best way for my wife and I, and any other parents out there to do this is to make sure we ourselves are setting a good example in embracing who God created us to be, not trying to change it. When a daughter sees her middle aged mom trying to chase her youth, coming home after having “work” done, I wonder what type of message this sends to her. Does she go to bed thinking, ‘what part of me do I need to change?’
    I do not mean to come off as critical here. I’ve got just as many insecurities as the next person. If someone handed me a marker and asked me to circle or x any part of my body that I didn’t like, chances are I would look like a tic-tac-toe board by the time it was all said and done. Everyone has something they don’t like about themselves. Don’t let the supermodels and movie stars fool you. But chasing after perfection by the world’s standards? Sadly, that is race that no one wins.
    The Bible tells us there is no need to chase this notion of perfection. We were created in the image of a perfect God. “So God created man in his own image…male and female were created in him (Gen 1:27.) Rick Warren writes, “He custom-made your body just the way he wanted it.” David praised God for that promise, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made(Psalm 119:13-14)”
    If you are struggling with your own self image today, hold tightly to the promise that you were created in the image of a perfect God, a God who does not make mistakes. And the next time you feel tempted to join the endless chase for so-called perfection, remember that your Creator is chasing after you with the promise that you are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” He’s the one who made you, and he wouldn’t change a thing.
    Would love to read your comments on the topic, maybe tips you have for raising your kids w/ a positive view of self. One tip I can think of is, don’t tivo Bridalplasty :) -mw

    matthew POSTED BY:
    matthew

    • 36 comments

    1. 1. Katie commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:06 am

      Growing up in today’s world is hard, especially as a young woman! I am not a parent, but growing up with two of the best, the only advice I can give you is to be a great dad. As a 19-year-old girl, I cannot stress enough the importance of a Daddy in a girl’s life! If her daddy tells her she is beautiful, even in those acne-filled, weight-gaining, horrible years of middle school, her self image will be better. Taking her on dates, affirming her abilities, and letting her know how important she is to you will do wonders. We girls, we just want to be beautiful in your eyes. Things are still difficult, but it makes it easier when dads are there.

    2. 2. Tracy commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:10 am

      Bridalplasty is a disgusting show. Plain and simple. I hate to be so blunt about it, but there really is no other way for me to describe it. I feel the same way about Toddlers and Tiaras. The little girls on that show make me so sad for the future. A lot of times parents make their kids go through extreme beauty treatments to look perfect so they can win a trophy and/or money. The kids are not quiet about disliking it either. And sometimes, the kids embrace it and they complain about themselves because something on them isn’t perfect.

      Three out of my 4 years in college I was a resident assistant (which I sometimes equate to being a parent. I taught them things and helped them grow. At least I hope I did). My third year I had a wing of all first year females. There were a lot of self image issues. Of course I recommended counseling and I was always a listening ear if they needed it, but I wanted to do more. I know that a lot of times, they would look in the mirror and saw something ugly. I’ve been guilty of it before. One night before I went to bed, I took post it notes and wrote “You are beautiful. Don’t change for anyone but yourself. Don’t let anyone tell you any differently” on them and posted them to the mirrors. When then got ready in the morning, that’s what they saw. It was just a reminder to them, that someone thinks they are beautiful just the way they are and they don’t need change.

    3. 3. Annette Granger commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:16 am

      Looking back, if I had known in high school how ‘normal’ I was, not really overweight at all, I don’t think I would have had such low self-esteem later in life . It could have been so different had I realized sooner my worth lies in Christ, not in what the world demands.

    4. 4. Rhonda commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:21 am

      Great blog! It was spot on!

      As a mother of a 9 year old daughter, I too struggle with this. I want her to be a confident woman, and in doing so, I need to be confident. If I stand in front of the mirror and call myself fat, or cry at how I look, what is she going to think? She loves me just as I am, so if I don’t love myself, then she may think, “If mommy doesn’t like how she looks, maybe she doesn’t like how I look.”

      Fat is not a word we use at our house. We want to “get healthy”. There is a difference between wanting to look nice and be presentable, and being overly conscious on our looks.

    5. 5. Wendy W. commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:36 am

      MW,
      AMEN! I agree wholeheartedly with you. My younger sister did have ‘work’ done under guise that it would make her fit what her body type shape was to have been. I tried to discourage her, but she made her own mind up. Fine. As for me, I may not have all the right curves or the perfect nose, eyes or mouth – but God made me and if I’m good in His eyes, then I have no reason or right to change it. Besides – when I get to Heaven, I will be in a new body/robe and this old fleshy and imperfect body will be cast away. That is what I tell my daughter (a teenager) and I hope and pray she can resist temptation to look/act like someone she isn’t. Thank you for this.

    6. 6. Wendy commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:40 am

      I just spoke with the teens at our church this past Wednesday about my testimony and how God showed me, through reading Ephesians, a picture of how a relationship should work. A guy represents Christ and a girl represents the Church. Christ pursued the Church first, with all her flaws and running away from Him, He still pursued her and loved her unconditionally. I feel girls today, and I was one of them in my teen/college years, feel the need to fix something about themselves on the outside so that guys will want them, but in truth, the man God has for them loves them in spite of their flaws, just like Christ loves the Church in spite of her flaws. I remember when God first showed me this through His Word, it was a release of sorts. No longer did I have to push to be something I wasn’t in order to get a guy to notice me, but instead, I was free to be who God created me to be and He would show me the godly man who would love me in spite of my flaws. Mark and I have been married for almost 2 years now and he is the man who loves me as Christ loves the Church. Oh to instill this in our youth today so that they stop chasing fleeting beauty and instead root themselves in the Word of God, so that they may know their true beauty in light of Christ.

    7. 7. Nancy commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:42 am

      Couldn’t agree with Katie more. As the mother of 3 daughters I can tell you that a girl’s self-image starts with how “daddy” sees her. It’s not really the “quantity” of time but the “quality”. My husband has worked long hours over the years, but he’s always made it a priority to put aside time for family, to talk to the girls individually about what’s going on with school, friends, etc. He now will send them “texts” to encourage them with whatever issues they might be facing. He lets them know how proud he is of every accomplishment, and they know he is always there for them. The biggest priority, though, has been demonstrating to the girls how important they are to God and impressing on them that they don’t need to worry about what others think about them-they only need to be concerned with what God thinks about them.

    8. 8. Litha commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:49 am

      I have a question… what about people who lose a lot of weight? Do you agree or disagree with them having excess skin removed? Keeping the excess skin can cause other problems. What do you think?

    9. 9. MaggieJean commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:49 am

      I also agree with everything you’ve said in this blog. I have an 11 year-old special needs son, a 3 year-old son, and a 1 year-old daughter and hope to teach them these special truths about their own Imago Deo. I struggle with this also, and am married to a man who makes it known that I am not up to his standards. So I feel like am constantly deprogramming myself and my children of my husband’s unhealthy attitudes. I am an attractive, average sized woman and my children are healthy and beautiful, but we will never live up to his standards of perfection. I do worry about the effects of such mixed messages on my kids, and just keep praying that God helps them hear the truth and filters out the lies.

    10. 10. Sarah Taylor commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:50 am

      The other day I was teasing my mother (55 years old) about her grey hair. She used to dye it, but in recent years has stopped. When I asked why she quit, she simply responded “I dont mind getting older, Sarah. In fact, these are the best years I’ve ever known. I dont want you to see me trying to be someone I’m not. I like my silver hair.” Then she teased me right back: “The Bible tells me its my crown of Wisdom! You can learn so many things from me!”

      I love that my mom feels this way. Its a gift to everyone around her – she’s secure in herself. My mom has always been more concerned with who she is on the inside rather than the outside anyway. Instead of a beauty salon, you’ll find her outside in the garden. And the mall is pretty much my mothers Kryptonite.

      Its one of my favorite things about her.

    11. 11. Julie Buckman commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:54 am

      I didn’t know there was a show out there like that, but am not one bit surprised. Thanks for your comments about how us all being fearfully and wonderfully made.

    12. 12. Maggie commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 11:56 am

      I try to let my daughters wear whatever their little hearts desire as long as it’s appropriate for the weather. My three year old often comes out in striped pants, plaid shirt, polka dot jacket and dress shoes. On the other hand, our kindergartner likes to be perfectly matched. My six year old is learning a thing or two about self-image from our toddler…. they’re both so beautiful!

    13. 13. Stefani commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 12:25 pm

      What a great blog! Society is so incredibly focused on how ‘perfect’ you look and how ‘perfect’ you are. I have a boy and a girl (5 and 7) – it is a huge challenge to raise them to have that positive sense of self when everywhere you go there is something that poses the ‘perfection’ aspect – I mean, even with toys – have you ever seen a Barbie doll that wasn’t ‘Perfect’ in the eyes of society? Boys have to be tough and handsome and girls have to be pretty and perfect.
      When we talk with Will and Sasha, we try not to focus on the outward appearances often – of course, when they look cute, we will point it out – but we try to focus on the positive things within them such as the kindness and love they show towards each other and friends and most importantly strangers. We remind them that cuteness is acceptable…but true beauty lies within.
      In order to reinforce and teach inward beauty, we focus on building positive character. When they accomplish something, we point it out and celebrate it….when they fail, we point out how hard they tried and celebrate the effort and work on trying again. We focus on learning to accept themselves and others for all that they (the good and the bad) are and to not judge them for how they look. Truly, for us, it is likely a bit easier as both children have their own “brokenness” due to many medical issues (so they have struggled since birth with illness and limitation)….and many of our friends don’t ‘look’ perfect (though we tell the kids that they are perfect in God’s Eyes) due to the nature of their disease (we have many friends with the same disease I have – Mitochondrial Disease – a progressive neuromuscular disease) so our children have always grown surrounded by people that don’t ‘look’ like what they see on TV or in books/movies/magazines/posters/videos. I was mortified when trying to purchase a Halloween costume for the kids – there wasn’t ONE appropriate children’s costume for my daughter….too short skirts or shirts too low cut or half shirts….after searching online for quite some time, I was able to finally find an appropriate costume for her….but the entire time, all I could think of was, “What are we teaching our children by condoning this type of dress? Make-up (for more than just pretend play) at an early age, tight clothing, short clothing, dolls that have not a single flaw…..the only thing to do is to not give in to it and to keep reminding them that their body is worth more than that….

      I guess the beauty is that Will and Sasha don’t look at beauty as ‘every hair in place’ – they look at beauty as what is in the heart and what you can give to others….the curse is that they have had to learn by watching a lot of heartache (in me, in themselves, and others we are close with) as our bodies change and fail us. A tough lesson to learn at such a young age – but I try to see a positive side and a teaching moment in every aspect of our lives so that we can glorify God in all that we do.
      We continue to remind them that even though things within our body ‘fail’ and are far from perfect – the beauty and the love inside cannot be stripped from us and we must cling to that and to God’s Promise – and that nothing else matters at the end of the day.
      Phew….well, I didn’t expect to get THAT philosophical…..but thanks for posting such a thought provoking blog! :)
      Keep making a difference and changing lives!
      Stefani

    14. 14. Robin Chopineaux commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 12:32 pm

      1 Cor13:12
      12 Now we see things imperfectly as in a cloudy mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely. ~

      The essence of our faith, to look in the mirror,,and see Christ, His work in and through us, trusting in His perfect love that brings wholeness and completion.
      The world is ALWAYS searching for someone and something else in the mirror~
      The world is hurting, lost, lonely and afraid,,Christ IS the only hope.

    15. 15. Lauren Hamel commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 12:41 pm

      Thanks for the up lifting comment. All that you said is so true. There for a while I was feeling as though I needed to change, not just my appearance but some of my beliefs for a guy to like me. But then I realised that if I needed to change everything about myself to make him happy, then he’s not good enough for me. I am not trying to be conceited, but there are young women out in this world who thaught the same thing as I did, and they have changed.And now they either are in a broaken down marriage or are a single parent. I finally realized that God has that special young man for me.And in God’s own time,He’ll bring us to gether.All I have to do is be patient and trust in God for His will in my life.Besides, I have plenty of time…Thanks for everything you do. I hope God extremely blesses you, your family, and your ministry.

    16. 16. Nancy Black commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 12:51 pm

      Hi Matthew, I seen the show andit made me sick so I turned it off. You know something, as human beings, we are never satisfied wth what God gave us.For years I hated my curly hair but I learned how to style it the way I want it. Which leads me to say, we are always searching for perfection and as human beings, we need to realize that we are not perfect and God knows that and yet he still loves us with all our falts. We need to be thankful for all the things God gave us when we came into this world. As for me, I am my own individual person and people should accept me for who I am not what they want me to be. :)

    17. 17. Karen commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 2:05 pm

      well, I feel better :)

    18. 18. kendra commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 2:53 pm

      I’ve never heard of this show. that is sad though. I have been looking at how i am differently lately. Thank you so much for the reminder! :)

    19. 19. Amy commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 4:03 pm

      I remember seeing that show on TV once and I watched a bit of it. I don’t like watching a lot of different television shows (and other forms of media) because they’re all giving bad images. It’s weird I feel that way since I grew up allowed to watch/read/whatever pretty much whatever I wanted to. I guess there were basic rules, the obvious ones. Nothing rated R or X…or whatever is above PG-13 lol. But I never wanted to. So…I think raising kids depends on the kids. That’s why no one has invented a manual for ‘em yet!

    20. 20. Sarah commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 4:05 pm

      Speaking as a 15 year old girl, and obviously not a parent, I gotta say that i really feel that i would feel better about myself if my dad would take a bigger part in my life. i all i wanna do is make him proud. i love it when he asks me about my friends and about whats going on in the different activities i’m involved in. it makes me feel like he really cares about me and loves me. i mean, i know he loves me, but its hard to see it sometimes. i learned to feel better about myself when i learned that God see’s me as beautiful no matter what i’m wearing, or what makeup i have on. i learned that God made me just the way i am for a special reason, and that i’m made in his image and i shouldn’t try to change that. i now refuse to wear makeup. and i hate it when i watch my friends putting on tons of makeup and taking forever to decide what to wear before going to church or the mall or something. i just wish they could understand how beautiful they are in just jeans, a t-shirt, and no makeup.

      so, my advice for your girls, is just take the time to listen to them. ask them questions. make sure that they know you’re there. i got really close to my dad for awhile and then something happened that tore us apart and we never got back to where we were. don’t let things get between you and your daughters. i mean, i’m not saying give them everything they want. i would never say that. i’m just saying, that when something comes up that has the potential to tear you apart, make sure that they KNOW that you still love them. don’t just accept that they know it and let it go. go the extra mile; ask the questions that don’t seem like something you would normally ask, haha. show them that you’re interested in anything that they’re interested in. it really means a lot. really. tell them they’re beautiful all the time.
      one time, i came home from something and my dad saw the shirt i was wearing and he said he loved it and that it brought out my eyes, or something like that. from then on, that was my favorite shirt. all because my dad had said he liked it. see how much it means?

    21. 21. Jenny commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 4:35 pm

      I love the song Fingerprints of God by Steven Curtis Chapman…it speaks to this very issue!!! He wrote the song for his oldest daughter…
      Please keep in mind that not all plastic surgery is about changing what you don’t like…people who have been severly injured often have reconstructive surgery to repair the damage…and let’s not forget about cleft palates and cleft lips…yes in today’s society having plastic surgery is often a result of vanity, but for some it helps them have a normal life…

      Physical beauty is only skin deep…what really matters is how you love others…and how you love others is often a relection of how you love yourself…so if we can all remember we are covered with God’s fingerprints imagine how we can change our small part of this world!!!

    22. 22. Clarice Johnson commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 4:36 pm

      It’s shows like this that have made my husband and I turn the tv off ( especially if there are no ballgames on :) ) For us, any way we can keep the enemy out of our home we want to do it. Our children are grown. Our daughter is a sophmore in college. We raised her to be a “godly lady”, not a “good girl”. We instilled Godly principals in her and our son as well. We taught her to seek to please God always and not man ( see Galatians 1:10). We tried to live by example as well. All girls want to be pretty – there’s nothing wrong with that. As long as they hear it from their dad’s first, it will make all the difference. Then let them know that God sees the heart and teach them to love God above all else. They will be beautiful like the Proverbs 31 woman.

    23. 23. Trisha commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 4:47 pm

      I agree that going into something like that with changing your self image after someone has already accepted you would not be right. It is so hard in today’s society. I have struggled with my image insecurities in the past. I was anorexic for years. I still sometimes struggle with this because of course when I am slender I get told how wonderful I look. But acceptance lately of what you just said, that I was made in God’s image and he did not make mistakes has helped me through.

      Embracing the weak parts of me as well as the strong has been huge this week for me because of a class I am taking and this also has helped me see that I am Perfect to God.

      The song by JJ Heller Love me for me I think goes perfect with your Broken Girl song as well as Jhonny diaz more Beautiful you and Mercy Me Beautiful. We need to learn to accept ourselves for who we are, for what God gave us and be perfect in Christ and know that God loves us Broken and all. :)

      We don’t have to change a thing. If we have the right man in our life, he loves us that way too :)

    24. 24. Nora Kahal commented:

      Fri 28/1/11, 8:25 pm

      Matthew, your a good parent. You and Emily are doing a good job with raising your children. This is how the world is turning out unfortunely… with these shows… anyway, God bless you always!

    25. 25. Hanna commented:

      Sat 29/1/11, 3:11 am

      I don’t know if you will ever read this but for me I have always had major appearance problems but they were compounded by being adopted and always being the odd looking one in a sea of white blondes. Please lavish your girls with real praise on how pretty they are. My parents hardly ever told me I looked pretty because they were so afraid of me being vain but it actually did the exact opposite. When they hit middleschool understand that they are insecure and please don’t treat the things they do like makeup as if they were the enemy. They will calm down and come to their senses eventually-just stand by them and tell them they ARE pretty. Sometimes we girls have to hear somethingfrom someone else to believe it.

    26. 26. matthew commented:

      Sat 29/1/11, 9:18 pm

      That’s great Hanna, thanks so much for commenting. I want you to know too that your experience will be used to help other people who have been made to feel the same way in their lives. -mw

    27. 27. matthew commented:

      Sat 29/1/11, 9:20 pm

      Sarah, Thanks for writing! That is awesome advice. And you are so right, it is important for dads to be involved in the lives of their kids. I hope you and your dad continue to have a closer relationship. -mw

    28. 28. matthew commented:

      Sat 29/1/11, 9:21 pm

      Well, the blog was really less about the evils of plastic surgery and more about how our society make us feel like we have to change how we look. I know there are many good uses for plastic surgery, and I would be the last one to say what is bad and what isn’t. But just trying to encourage people that God looks at our hearts. -mw

    29. 29. matthew commented:

      Sat 29/1/11, 9:22 pm

      Wow, thanks for the comment Annette. I appreciate the perspective. -mw

    30. 30. Crystal commented:

      Sun 30/1/11, 7:49 pm

      I actually did a devotion with my College Ladies Group about the subject of how we view ourselves and how God views us. And I really placed a lot of emphasis on the fact God created us in His image, I did this devotion in December and we had just had a bad snow storm, and I found a fact that said no two snowflakes are the same, they are one of a kind masterpieces, just as we are, we are all one of a kind masterpieces handcrafter by our Father in Heaven.
      Its hard not to be self consciour, but I find as your relationship with God grows closer, as a young woman, I can start looking away from what the world thinks, and I listen to what God thinks and each day He reminds me I am perfect just the way I am. I love the song by Johonny Diaz “More Beautiful You” and it says….”dont buy the lies, discuises, or hoops they make you jump through, you were made to fill a purpose that only you could do, and there could never be a more beautiful you.” I really think every young lady should listen to that song, because it helped me look to God for the idea of beauty instead of listening to the world. :-)

    31. 31. Melissa Hayes commented:

      Sun 30/1/11, 8:29 pm

      I am glad you wrote about this, Matthew. Before I ramble on, I do want to say I am not anti-plastic surgery at all. I just want to share a personal anecdote – one that really pertains less to plastic surgery and more to the message we send to those we are influencing.
      My sister already had a son when she found out that her second baby would be a girl, and she told me before she even delivered her that this would be a wholly different challenge because this baby would be the one who would look directly to her as an influence (as opposed to her son who looks to the primary male in his life – his father). As a woman, she knew that not only would she transfer her confidences, but she would pass on her insecurities as well. I had never thought that way before of how raising a son and a daughter would be different in that way.
      Years ago, our mother had plastic surgery for what she considered a flaw – a flaw that she passed on to me. My ears stick out. It sounds so silly for me to even type it here, because it sounds so completely superficial. And it is. When I was an adolescent, I daydreamed of having the same surgery to pin them back. But when my sister told me how she felt about having a girl – excited to create life yet nervous about influencing another woman so powerfully – I decided at that moment that maybe I no longer needed to correct that flaw. Maybe it was something to embrace.
      I don’t blame my mother at all for her decision to go under the knife. She is an amazing woman and an amazing mother, one who loves me unconditionally and endlessly encourages me in spite of not having a mother as an example (after losing her own mother to suicide when she was just 12). Her childhood and her life was much more trying than my own thus far. She didn’t have a mama there telling her that she was beautiful like I do. I’ll never understand her insecurities and the decisions she made because of them, but that is because she did NOT pass on a legacy of addiction and depression.
      We all want better for our children, The legacy my mother is leaving in my sister and me is a great one. The life she has made for us is better than the life she had. and I decided that changing a part of me sends the message to my future children that it’s necessary to change. I’m still insecure about it, but because I know it’s something I can potentially pass on, I am learning to love it. Because it’s a reminder. A reminder that I am the woman my mama made me – and that just makes me lucky.
      -m

    32. 32. Chloe Scott commented:

      Mon 31/1/11, 11:57 am

      Amen my friend what an amazing article/blog

    33. 33. Terri Anne commented:

      Tue 1/2/11, 3:39 pm

      One of my biggest fears as a single adoptive Mom to a sweet girl is raising her to be confident in the beauty God has given her, and not chase that ‘ideal’ that doesn’t exist. Everytime I tell her she’s beautiful or pretty I worry she’s going to get the message that’s where her worth is. Although all girls need to hear those things, so it’s a balancing act. I try to tell her just as often how strong she is, how smart, how funny, and how sweet. I’ve also asked my female family members to not discuss the latest diet they tried, how much weight they want to lose, or to comment on someone else’s weight loss in front of her. I try to make a conscience effort to not put myself down in front of her either. Fighting the messages from our secular fallen world will be as you say an uphill battle. Having a Dad who is already aware & deliberate about that is half the battle though.

    34. 34. Mary commented:

      Wed 2/2/11, 12:38 pm

      Matthew, your doing such a great job as a parent God has bless you in so many ways and you are an inspiration to everyone who listens to your music. I’m a single mother of two and as time goes by I realize what God is doing in my life and as long as we put God above everything he will take care of us and are next generations. The best thing to teach are kids is what was done for us, the life that was given for us, so that we could be renewed. May God Bless you and your family.

    35. 35. Scherezade Espinoza commented:

      Fri 4/2/11, 11:08 am

      I can’t help but laugh out at that show, i was flipping the channels the other day and came to one episode where one of the girls was beening eliminated. And the judge told her” i’m sorry, but you are not going to have a perfect wedding.” The girl felt horrible! absurd these ideas that society has now a days! I was born with Spina Bifida, can’t walk and with this comes at times physical marks, so sure if someone handed me a marker i’d probably circle a few things i would want to change, but through Jesus i was able to realize that i am whole in Him, that i lack nothing. I believe that young women should look at themselves through Jesus’s Mirror and see how He sees us as beautiful pearls. If there are things that are at reach, that you want to change..go ahead. I’m not saying if your struggling with weight issues, not to find a solution and workout. But the thing is not to become a slave of your body because Jesus came to set us free. So as daughters lets make sure that apart from makeup, and the glamorous stuff, that what society can see plain clearly is Jesus Christ liviing in us. And i can testify to this. When I surrender and let him take control, He gives me this special glow, something different! and i’m not wearing any makeup!…there are advertisments of products that promise to give you a glow blah blah blah you want an authentic real glow..try Jesus!=D

    36. 36. Yer Gutierrez commented:

      Tue 8/2/11, 10:10 am

      As naive as this may sound, I’ve watched the first few episodes of Bridalplasty and was drawn to it. It’s fascinating to see the contestant come closer to what their perception of beauty is – whether it’s fixing their nose, arm/chin tuck, breast implants… But even in the end, I still don’t think they will be happy. As a woman, I can definitely mark areas of my body that I am unhappy with.. “if only…. then I would be happier” and that’s the lie that gets to me somtimes. I agree with you completely Matthew, chasing perfection of this world is nothing but a trap. No one can achieve physical perfection based on this world’s standard because there will always be someone else out there who is younger and more beautiful. We will never achieve perfection. But, in God’s eyes.. we are it. He loves us for who we are, and he has created us exactly the way he wanted us to be. This is something that I continuously have to work towards.. and relearn about myself. Thanks for this blog and your words of encouragement!!

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